Sunday, 7 September 2008

Am I Crazy? :D

It was again a complaining, fighting evening with my dearest ettan... And we both were enjoying doing that.. as usual.:D after a 45 minutes of smashy arguments and cutest thunderstorms and "Dishyooms.." at last we got tired and became ready for a compromise talk.

And here goes my every time i opt...then also my choice was a walk through the IT highway where i can have a look on sm handsome IT geeks and ettan can have a simultaneous "resting " in the near by lonely bus stop benches..! And now we finished our one round walk upto the Gr8 Tidel Park and returned. i was little disappointed on that day bcoz it was a sunday and a holiday... "Y these IT companies r having an off on sunday?" my biggest question that moment...:P

We decided to sit in the nearest bus stop to return. i was tired but the fresh air walk made me happy. At the end of the day of practically doing "nothing" i really wanted to do something crazy. If u r thinking that i could scream madly then i would love to call u crazy bcoz it was night 10.30 and if im screaming there in the very next morning i would have been in a Mental Hospital. Ok. I was requesting,begging, challenging, ettan to find something crazy for me to do at that moment.... He was keep telling me..."Stop these nonsense...!dont be crazy!". But i was not ready to listen.

Oh My God..!the next second there entered 3 handsome guys to the screen and they sat on the bench just near to us. Suddenly ettan told me..." what ever i say...Look that Tree Opposite to u..Cross the road and get one leaf from that tree.." I looked. The tree is on a platform of devider. if i need to get the leaf i've to climb it. Just have to create a show! But i've tempted him and if im not shame..!

I've decided to do it...but the biggest problem was to cross the road which is one of the fasest highway of the city. I made calculation. there is no images to keep here...what u want u do it....and i've done it...!when i started to cross...ettan was staring me...when he realized that i gonna do it...he started to smile...the enjoying cute smile...! I blinked my eyes playfully and crossed and climbed the platform. Then whole eyes on me. I started to laugh and plucked 4 leaves by jumping. Then i made my royal return!

U can never imagine...I was feeling like in heaven. I was jumping infront of ettan. One of my happiest moment in my life happened...I've never enjoyed some prank this much. My joy made my brother happy. Those 3 guys... They were looking at us and laughingly commenting on us... I was l feeling like a kindergarten gal who won a trophy in a hide n seek or snake n ladder game..

I can never forget that wonderful night which made me realize that somewhere in my heart still im keeping my childhood and innocence!

Saturday, 16 August 2008

Dreaming Creepers!

It was not possible for me to differentiate the time. first i thought it was night. But later I came to know that it was early in the morning. Me and amma were sitting in the small hall in our old illam. We were chatting something interesting. I was wondering why Ani is not joining us. Bulb lights were glowing on the walls. Where is the Tubelight?

We were doing something sure..becoz otherwise i will never go for any of such domestic kinda work..but y im not able to understand what we were doing...suddenly amma opened the back door for some purpose. black colored shining creature came into was flying..its velvet black colour made it more attractive and at the same time more was a snake...!

“Ammu..its a snake...” amma told me. U may think that comment is unnecessary..but seriously, at that moment i think that comments understand what was it. I was keep looking at it. I got panic. Started screaming. Unlike the previous times i felt amma was enjoying its beauty. I've never seen such a fastest creature in my life. And its royal appearance brought more fear in me. It was flying here and there. Sometimes it came to the floor... there was not sufficient space for a and amma were keep moving to and fro like we were arranging space for its royal play. In those bulb lights its body was glowing like an obsedien. Amma was showing me...ammu look at its shiny na?...huh...!amme..stop we will throw this away...think about it.!i was scolding her.
Now it's flying and sneezing over us. We came into his vision. I felt it got confused with something like which one of us will be his next prey. I can even remember his was looking at me. It was a new experience to see the eyes of a snake so closely. I started screaming again...amma told....dear...pls stop will notice u by ur weird movements. I started to keep mum!

Again it flown to air. This time...i made a mistake. Before amma could tell me anything I took something long from the room and have beaten it. Nothing happened.but this provoked him and he came to the floor. Now, this time it was behind me... i was running here and there. It was like it was really waiting at me to make some mistake an i made. I was trying not to put a leg on him. But next second i felt something touched my feet. Oh,...its really burning...!

I opened my eyes. Oops! it was a dream. Where is amma..?I thought about her. she was with me. But my legs were still burning...!

Wednesday, 30 January 2008

Worshipping Shadowism!!!!!!!!!!

Worshipping Shadowism!!!!!!!!!!

Have u people ever thought about the shadows? Damn!!!! These craps will never let me do anything. Even they do not have their own bodies. They can rule me through their instabilities. Still they made me to say that “I admire them, I respect them, and at last I’ve started worshipping them ”. They can bring out my whole emotions in life.

Ofcourse I admire God…and I accept him as the almighty. I never felt that I am praying or pleading him anything. I felt he is someone with whom I can have an open conversation. He is someone who doesn’t need any explanations from my side. He knows me more than I know myself.

But in case of shadows…they r some creatures who know me very well. Still they can haunt me. They can ask me silent questions…they need explanations for everything… Again. Here lies the crap again… I love them… Huh!!!! I think. how can I? I love them because they are someone at least have cares for me. I start love them when I start love myself and I start to hate them when I’ve hatred towards me. Really it’s not a big deal…

They will ask me questions in each of my actions. But those questions will never be personal. They do not have any intention to hurt me as the original fleshy bodies have. As far as my concern, they want me to think on every action.

I started care shadows from those days when I got the theory of “I don’t want to be a blind follower… I don’t want any follower… I need only a co-traveler ”. I know only these silent creatures can accept this agenda which is really a trap. Since they r suffering me a lot…. I gave them the full freedom to rule me …to haunt me…to irritate me with bloody questions…. to make me titter sometimes…to make me cry as anyone can…(I hate this part of mine… as hell).

Shadows r not my followers…. and I am not following them too. I think I am blindly believing Shadowism!!!!!.

Mission : Finding Myself.!!!!!!!

Mission : Finding Myself.

My ways in life…may be they r so immature…still I love them… They were full of warmth. Each time they were vague. They confused me at each point. Let me tell u. They were unknown for me. Those paths were completely filled with darkness. I was moving like a blind. But somehow. Everytime.In every turning… one hand was ready to hold me. Ready to move me in right way. But those hands never told me where I would meet the next turn. Even now. I really want to return to the stages in my life where I found strange faces those which later l made familiar. Y I really thinks that it was better them to be strange…? I don’t know.

I am sure that if I wish to return to my old days…. I shall lost my way in the middle… they were so strange for me. It was completely an aimless voyage. And I am that much sure in another thing that my future ways will not be different with them. Even if I’ve some aim for my physical existence… For my spiritual life…for my philosophies…. for my mental stabilities…. I m not sure that i can find a solution..!